• Thoughts

    When is a Body deserving of having Violence visited upon it?

    I had a spirited conversation (read: argument) with my driving instructor and another student yesterday. No, it wasn’t about my reverse technique (which is atrocious, by the way. Wish me luck next class). What was it about, then? We were on the road doing a test-run when he suddenly blurted about a mad girl, followed quickly by a tirade of words. I was confused; “did something happen?” “Ahn ahn, didn’t you see that girl we just passed that her whole belly is outside and her short is barely covering anything?” I didn’t. I had been minding my business. So, I said, “Oh, I didn’t.” It would have ended there, but…

  • Articles

    Uwa was raped and murdered in Church. Do you have any other questions?

    When the Mirabel Centre launched the #JusticeForUwa campaign on the 31st of May in response to the violent rape and murder of 22 year old Uwaila Omozuwa at a Church in Benin, the fire spread quickly across the internet with many enraged at the incident and determined to pursue justice. Nigerians, home and abroad, lent their voices to the campaign and passionately asked for gaps they could stand in, to ensure that Uwa’s murderer doesn’t keep walking the streets after prematurely ending her life. We were still reeling from the all too familiar pain of that loss when we were hit across the face with another woman whose death in…

  • Articles

    She’s 15: Teenage girls are not objects of your perverse sexual fantasy

    On Saturday, the 11th of April, Yul Edochie, a Nigerian actor, took to Twitter to celebrate his daughter on her 15th birthday. His message was innocuous, and one would expect, as in most situations where a person wishes their loved one a ‘happy birthday’ on social media, that others would join them in celebrating. The messages quickly took a disturbing turn when grown men inundated the comments by not only making sexually suggestive comments about this teenage girl’s body but also making remarks about her virginity or assumed lack of it. I wish I could say I was surprised, but I wasn’t. And that, knowing that this is a reality…

  • Articles

    The day after #16daysofActivism

    Just in case you are wondering, the 16 days of activism against gender-based violence is an annual campaign that begins on the 25th of November – the International Day for the Elimination of Violence against Women – and ends on the 10th of December – Human Rights Day. Fitting, isn’t it? The purpose of this annual campaign is to raise awareness of the numerous ways that women are exposed to violence simply by virtue of being women, share information on how we all as the larger society can be better allies to women, and fuel existing conversations around women safety. The theme for this year is Orange the World: Generation…

  • Articles,  Uncategorized

    That’s the thing; Privilege should come with Responsibility

    Two weeks ago, I was at the University of Lagos for the monthly seminar organized for PEIFFUND mentees, whom I happen to be one of. The topic of concern was “Communication Skills” so you can probably imagine how interactive it got. After the session, in the spirit of that interaction, four of us got into a conversation about feminism; I and 3 young men who I have gotten to know over the past few months. Now, this article is not a run-down of our conversation, but I’d like to highlight a few things that I think we all need to pay attention to in the way that we show up…

  • Articles

    The Beginning

    As a child, one of my favorite adults was Mummy Tolu. While growing up, she was a neighbor and what you could refer to as a ‘second mummy’. She asked all the important questions like “Is your mum back?” when my mum traveled and “have you eaten?’ when the answer was no. When I got into the boarding house as a student in Junior Secondary School 1, it became a thing that Mummy Tolu would give me rolls of milk, milo, and some detergents at the beginning of every term up until my last year in secondary school. If it didn’t happen, then resumption was incomplete. It always happened. I…

  • Articles

    Marriage Is Not For Every Woman

    I know exactly what I typed. Yes, that’s exactly what I meant to type. Now, before you feel a type of way, do note that I did not say “any” woman, because then, that would be another type of baloney. It’s tiring, to say the least, the way we manage to connect even the most casual cords in a woman’s life to marriage and someone she may someday be joined with. What’s even more tiring is the way that has been made the only acceptable reality. If you speak and your voice is a little too clear, you hear things like “is it someone like you that will find a…

  • Articles

    He Called Me Ashawo

    Two weeks ago, I was called a bedpreneur, or in popular Nigerian parlance, an Ashawo. On Instagram too, for that matter. But how did we get there? Summarily, two teenagers, a boy and a girl, were caught exploring each other in ways that were sexual in nature. The adults present, horrified that something like that was happening with teenagers, reportedly proceeded to punish the girl while admonishing her. All the while, the boy, her partner in exploration, was almost excluded from the conversation, almost as if the words of reproach had nothing to do with him. A man, a witness to this spectacle, became angry and proceeded to give the…